I can see our last meeting had no effect on you. You still refuse to vote for me, Silas, for captain of the popularity team!
In the immortal words of Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: “Oh, c’mon!”
Who do you really want representing our school? Some foolish frat boy? Some addle brained athlete? Or one of the other mindless members of the countless cretinous cliques that infest our hallowed halls?
Silence, fool! Muffle your mouth’s mumbling!
There is only one student capable of reviving the greatness this school has lost: I! Silas!
I’l show you…
I’ll show you all!
Hnnuuuuuugh-lo. Brains for meeting me here.
I mean, ‘Thanks’ of corpse.
‘Scuse me. It must be time for my medicine…
That’s better. Okay, enough undead puns. I’m setting my people back about a hundred-and-fifty years with them.
But what I was saying, was: Thanks for meeting with me. A lot of the students here won’t come within a mile of me.
I’ve been thinking about running for “Best Character”. Can I count on your vote? No zombie’s ever won before. I could be the Jackie Robinson of humorous, young adult, monster-themed fiction!
Man, just thinking about it makes me…
Maybe you should hurry off to the ballot booths now.
Oh hey, what’s up? Didn’t I see you at Gents’ party a couple Saturdays ago? We didn’t really get a chance to talk. I was pretty busty.
I mean ‘busy’. How do you make a typo in spoken conversation? Weird!
Maybe you don’t remember me ’cause I was in the bathroom with my friend, Grace, all night. I don’t think anybody in the whole school’s ever been that drunk at one of Gents’ parties before!
Okay, now you remember me, huh?
Well then you know I’m basically a saint, the way I take care of my friends like that. Don’t you think that deserves a vote for “Best Character”?
I know I’m tiny (both in stature and in the role I played in ‘For A Good Time, Call Unicorn’), but I’m spunky and I’ve got what it takes to represent the Monster Exchange Program!
Thor-bleeding-Anubis! Why do they make these things so hard to use?
How am I supposed to mark my vote with these bandage-mitten hands?!
This school needs some more accessible ballot booths. Don’t make me get my dad involved. You wouldn’t want to meet him when he’s angry.
When isn’t he angry, though? Remember when my house got vandalized? Oh, he was furious!
And Odin forbid I bring home a boy! He thinks every boy in school is out to “pillage” his daughter!
Oh, I’m making him sound awful. He’s really a pussy-cat. It’s just his berzerker blood boils so easily. You just have to know how to talk him down. Like my mom. She doesn’t even need to put a sleeping curse on him any more when he gets upset.
Anyway, the point is: I’m here voting and you should be too. At least demand that I get my own starring role in a story! It only takes a minute and you might win a free copy of The Complete Monster Exchange Program. (I recommend ‘Werewolf Stays True To Herself’, personally.)
Hey, wait up!
It’s -it’s me, Christine!
Man, Anna told me I changed a lot over the summer, but I guess I didn’t believe her. You really didn’t recognize me?
I know I don’t have much of a reputation around the school. I spent the past few years hiding in my hoodie. That’s why I was surprised when I was asked to star in my very own issue of The Monster Exchange program.
‘Who’d want to read about me?’ I thought. But Terri and Andi kept saying they believed in me, and I guess some of their confidence rubbed off on me! I don’t want to sound conceited, but “Werewolf Stays True to Herself” is one of the best issues in The Monster Exchange Program. Of course, my opinion’s a little biased.
Why don’t you take a few seconds to go vote for your favorite story? I’m not looking for validation, but you might win your very own free copy of the complete series!
Hi, what’s going on?
Oh, I’m Mary. We- We’ve met before. A few times actually…
No, don’t feel too bad. Nobody ever seems to be able to remember me. I guess I’ve got a forgettable face.
Well, there is one ‘boy’ that seems to know who I am. And he’s pretty cute, too. I didn’t know I was into robots, ha!
…I just told you: ‘Mary’.
That means I probably won’t be getting many votes for ‘Most Popular’. That’s okay. I’m used to it.
I’ll get a few votes, I bet. At least I won’t come in last place!