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Guest Blogger: Heidi
Oh hey, what’s up? Didn’t I see you at Gents’ party a couple Saturdays ago? We didn’t really get a chance to talk. I was pretty busty.
*giggle*
I mean ‘busy’. How do you make a typo in spoken conversation? Weird!
Maybe you don’t remember me ’cause I was in the bathroom with my friend, Grace, all night. I don’t think anybody in the whole school’s ever been that drunk at one of Gents’ parties before!
Okay, now you remember me, huh?
Well then you know I’m basically a saint, the way I take care of my friends like that. Don’t you think that deserves a vote for “Best Character”?
I know I’m tiny (both in stature and in the role I played in ‘For A Good Time, Call Unicorn’), but I’m spunky and I’ve got what it takes to represent the Monster Exchange Program!
-Heidi
‘Werewolf Stays True To Herself’ is free today, Aug. 30
Guest Blogger: Christine
Hey, wait up!
It’s -it’s me, Christine!
Man, Anna told me I changed a lot over the summer, but I guess I didn’t believe her. You really didn’t recognize me?
I know I don’t have much of a reputation around the school. I spent the past few years hiding in my hoodie. That’s why I was surprised when I was asked to star in my very own issue of The Monster Exchange program.
‘Who’d want to read about me?’ I thought. But Terri and Andi kept saying they believed in me, and I guess some of their confidence rubbed off on me! I don’t want to sound conceited, but “Werewolf Stays True to Herself” is one of the best issues in The Monster Exchange Program. Of course, my opinion’s a little biased.
Why don’t you take a few seconds to go vote for your favorite story? I’m not looking for validation, but you might win your very own free copy of the complete series!
-Christine
‘Robot Goes To Prom’ is free today, Aug. 29
Guest Blogger: Sally Ringworm
*BAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaarrffffffffffff!*
*sssccchhhhlllllluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup!*
Oh, hey, sorry, I was just eating my lunch. Do I have anything on my proboscis?
I’m Sally. You know, Grace’s friend? You’ve gotta you remember her.
Anyway, I’m sure the whole school’s been bugging you about it, but if you get a chance, I’d really appreciate your vote.
I know I’m not the coolest or prettiest girl in school, but I’m pretty well-liked around here. You could do worse than me for ‘Most Popular’.
-Sally
‘Werewolf Stays True To Herself’ is free today, Aug. 20
Guest Blogger: Christine
Hi, have a seat. I’m just finishing lunch.
I know it’s not very lady-like to talk and eat, but that’s just who I am. Not always, though…
A year ago, I would have been way too shy to meet up and ask you to vote for me for Monster Exchange Program Champ.
Then again, you probably wouldn’t have even listened to me if I had. I was pretty much the gawkiest, gangliest girl in the entire school. Not to mention my frequent “bad hair” days.
Ah, dang. There’s the bell. I gotta get to class!
-Christine
‘Werewolf Stays True To Herself’ is free today, Aug. 20
‘Werewolf Stays True To Herself’ has been published!
Well, it’s been a long time coming, but Werewolf Stays True To Herself is finally available for your consumption!
Grab it from Amazon, by clicking here.
Why not enjoy a sample, right now!
***
Theater, Visual Arts, Study Hall, Lunch. Christine had a great schedule. Chemistry, pre-calc and world history in the afternoons would be a pain, but two blow off classes and two free periods in the mornings meant she could do her homework during school hours instead of at home. This semester looked like it would be all right. Although with two of her best friends here with her, she seriously doubted she’d ever actually get any work done in study hall.
“Don’t look now,” Anna told her, “but you’re getting a few stares.”
Guilelessly, Christine whipped her head around trying to figure out what Anna was talking about. For half a second, she caught a glimpse of Chip Deadlift poking his head around the door frame. As soon as she spotted him, he ducked back into the hallway.
Oh, great, Christine thought, her good mood ruined. Another year of this.
“Can’t they just leave me alone?” she asked out loud, not really expecting an answer. “Can’t they find someone else to pick on? Just for a few weeks?” Christine shrugged herself deeper into her hoodie. She wore it even during the summer heat, even despite her already thick coat of fur. It did a good job of hiding her body in a formless lump.
It was only over this past summer that Christine had finally gotten her change fully under control, which was why the last few years of school had been such a nightmare. She had been trapped in a part-way point between human and wolf. Too hairy for a human girl, but not hairy enough to fully cover her skin. Her teeth were huge and jagged, but she still had the fore-shortened muzzle of a primate. Her mouth had looked like a handful of pointy marshmallows. Her legs were bent at odd (for a human) angles, but possessed none of the extra muscle and sinew she would eventually get from her wolf side. Her ears and nose were too big, but didn’t sense any more acutely than a human’s.
“I don’t think they were here to pick on you,” Arista told her.
“Definitely not,” Anna agreed. “They were totally checking you out!”
“Whatever,” Christine said dismissively.
“Christine!” Anna said. “You probably don’t see it yourself, but I was buried in a tomb all summer. And when I saw you this morning, I was like, ‘whoa’! You are looking so pretty these days!”
Anna was wrong if she thought Christine hadn’t noticed. Tracking your body’s changes is practically a religion to werewolves. Even if she hadn’t cared about it herself, her parents would have called her out on it. They were super old fashioned, strict orthodox werewolves. They had held a humiliating ciento cincañera to celebrate her “blossoming into womanhood” over the summer.
No, Christine knew she had changed. But she also knew she hadn’t changed enough. She was still the same awkward hairball she’d always been.
“Whatever,” she repeated.
“Christine…” Arista admonished her. “It breaks my heart when you talk like that. You have to stop putting yourself down! Listen to me, I know what that’s like and where that will lead you.”
“Whatever!” It was quickly becoming today’s catch phrase. “You’re probably the hottest girl in school!”
“Well, yes, that is true,” Arista put a hand to her chest in mock immodesty. “But I never felt pretty or confident or, or proud until I met Gilbert and he liked me for who I truly was.
“You just need to find yourself a really sweet guy for a boyfriend, to remind you of the strong, beautiful woman you are on the inside.”
“Yeah, but to like my insides, they’d have to get past all of this,” Christine said gesturing to herself.
“That’s what we’re trying to tell you!” Anna said. “All of ‘that’ looks great! You could have any boy you wanted!” She would have been drooling if her body contained any fluids. “A beefy hunk of a man, just as smokin’ hot as you are! One who knows what he wants and isn’t afraid to prove that you want it too!”
“Jeez, somebody’s on the prowl!” Arista laughed. “Don’t listen to her, Christine. You need to find a nice guy. One that will treat you with respect. Like Gilbert,”
“Oh, no! Gr-” Anna barely managed to stop herself from calling Arista’s boyfriend “gross”. She quickly tried to talk her way out of her gaff. “Gilbert’s great. I love him to death, you know that, but… Christine’s never dated anybody before. She needs someone that can show her the ropes. Break her in!”
“She’s not a filly! Listen to me,” Arista begged Christine. “I’ve been with guys like that and it never ended well. Settling down with Gilbert is the best decision I’ve ever made,”
“You’re just proving my point!” shouted Anna. “You’ve been with guys like that. Christine has no frame of reference. She needs to be wild for a while. Make some memories. She can’t just settle for the first nice guy that comes along like one of those weirdoes that marry their high-school sweetheart and never make out with more than one person in their lives!”
“Guys, it doesn’t matter,” Christine finally put an end to the argument. “Good guy, bad boy. Nobody’s gonna want to date this,” she gestured at herself from head to toe.
Arista sighed, shaking her head.
“Gilbert!” she called over her shoulder.
Gilbert stopped his game of Magic: The Gathering Solitaire and bumbled over to where the three girls sat.
“Don’t you think Christine is pretty?” Arista demanded.
Gilbert didn’t know a lot about girls, but he was fairly certain this was a test.
“Not… as pretty as you?” he guessed.
“This isn’t a test,” she told him.
This is a test, Gilbert’s brain confirmed.
“Christine’s my friend. It’s okay for you to say she’s pretty,”
“Well, I mean, sure. She’s pretty…?” Gilbert flinched, but Arista didn’t seem upset. Maybe this wasn’t a test?
“He’s just saying that,” Christine said.
“No, seriously. Look at her. And take that jacket off so he can see you,” Arista commanded.
Christine huffed and rolled her eyes as she took off her sweatshirt. She stood up and summarily spun around as Arista ordered. She sarcastically stuck out a hip and placed a hand on it, like a cartoon glamour model.
And yes. Yes, perverts. She had six breasts. But we’re trying to focus on her inner beauty here, okay?
For completeness, though: two columns of three.
She was about to sit down when a blast of blood splattered in her face. It had come from Gilbert’s nose.
“Gilbert!” Arista shrieked.
“Whuh-hut?” he whined. “You said I could think she was pretty!”
“I said you could say it. Not think it!” Arista stormed out in a fit.
“Daw, gravy… I knew this was a test.” Gilbert muttered as he hurried after her.
“Still think he was just saying it?” Anna asked. She tossed Christine her hoodie so she could wipe the blood off her face.
“Well…” Christine struggled to retract her hair and fangs, leaving her a perfectly ordinary, blood-soaked, human girl. It was easier to wipe the blood off her skin than to strain it out of her fur. “Whatever.”
***
As always, if you’d like to get started with the Monster Exchange Program series, you can pick up issue 1, Blob Fits In, by clicking here!
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The Original Werewolf Who Stayed True To Herself
Werewolf Stays True To Herself has been coming along slowly but steadily for the past few days. I thought I’d take a moment to introduce some of our readers to another “werewolf” that stayed true to herself. I say “werewolf” in quotes because… well, just read the books to find out!
There’s no dearth of girl power, supernatural, romance heroine books/movies/TV shows these days. But the one that sticks in my mind is the Mercy Thompson series by Patricia Briggs.
Mercy is lovable and headstrong and always does the right thing regardless of what others might think of her. Christine could use a few pointers from her!
When I sat down and decided it was time to start writing, the first story I wrote was a Mercy Thompson fan fic(embarrassing, I know!). Although it had a good story behind it, it sort of fell apart and remains unfinished. But, I learned a lot from doing it and Mercy will always have a special place in my heart because of it.
As always, if you’d like to get started with the Monster Exchange Program series, you can pick up issue 1, Blob Fits In, by clicking here!
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Werewolf Isn’t Quite Staying True To Herself Yet
Newcastle Werewolf (Photo credit: Metal Chris)
Werewolf Stays True to Herself is coming along quite nicely. Astute readers might have already spotted our titular werewolf in a cameo appearance in a previous story. No hints! See if you can pick her out!
It’s a fun story. It’s entertaining, but… She’s not really ‘staying true to herself’ yet.
But I have a few plans for ways that she could!
1) Suddenly popular after blossoming over the summer, she must remember who her true friends are.
2) Her parents’ old fashioned orthodox werewolf ways are publicly embarrassing her, but she has to remember that her parents love her and will always be there for her.
3) Her new boyfriend is pressuring her to go too far. She needs to respect herself enough to pass on her advances.
That’s cute, right? What are same ways that you’ve stayed true to yourself?
As always, if you’d like to get started with the Monster Exchange Program series, you can pick up issue 1, Blob Fits In, by clicking here!
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Can’t Get Enough ‘Monster Exchange Program’?
This image is of a screencap of the television series "Doctor Who", it is intended for use in the article "Tooth and Claw" to visually aid and provide critical commentary in describing a key moment. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Man, I feel your pain. Andi and I are hard at work on the next issue: Werewolf Stays True to Herself.
Christine has it tough. She was always the scrawniest, gangliest hairiest girl in school. Her parents were always embarrassing her with their strict, orthodox, Old Country werewolf traditions. And she could never get a boyfriend!
But all that changes when she blossoms into a sexy werewolf over the summer!
But, will she remember who she truly is, on the inside?
As always, if you’d like to get started with the Monster Exchange Program series, you can pick up issue 1, Blob Fits In, by clicking here!
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Monster Exchange Program 